Fantasy Friday

I'm tired today.  

After working late last night, the dogs woke me early this morning... I helped the hubby load up the truck with a haul for Goodwill, and we ran other various errands while we were out and about... the Verizon store to get a new cell phone for him since he lost his earlier this week, then to Walmart for a few things, then to Braum's for some milk and lunch, and a final stop at the liquor store for hubby's beer.

I did dishes and cleaned up the kitchen after he left for work.  Made him a salad using some of my leftover chicken from lunch, so he has something to eat when he gets home after midnight.  Filled out the rebate for his phone and got it ready to mail. Created our MyVerizon account online and updated our MyCircle friends.

Then, after a few emails with my sister in California, I decided to sit back and fantasize a little bit by reading my latest issue of MaryJanesFarm magazine.

Truly, this is fantasizing at its height.  To model my life after MaryJane Butters would be far, far sweeter than being a Martha Stewart clone, who I never cared for anyway.

If you've never heard of MaryJane, then you really need to take a look at her empire.  Yep, she's got an empire.  Lucky farmgal that one.  

I'm officially jealous.

Death Rattle Of A Marriage...

In the past did marriages last longer out of love or out of not having a choice?  Did they last longer because we were taught you made your bed so lay in it?  Was the past a more romantic time or just a time of acceptance?

After thirty-eight years, I wonder if my marriage has entered its final chapter.  I try to see when it began to end and can not put my finger on the exact moment or even get close.  It was gradual and no one event caused this illness.

Once we could not stay away from each other, now we can hardly stay in the same room.  Once we talked for hours, now we hardly talk at all.  Once we use to hang on to each others words as if we could taste the sweetness of them.  Now the bitterness shows on his face, my words are of no importance and my presence is not desired.

I shall not say it was his fault or mine.  There is no one fault here.  I only know I can not bear to see the hate in his face any longer. 

I check the pulse of my marriage like a paramedic automatically checks a decapitated corpse for life.  There is but a thread of love's heart beat...do I pull the sheet over the face of this or do I try CPR one more time?

Off To Work I Go

Looking north on I-35 in Kansas from my "office"

Yes, it's time to head to work again.  3 pm to 11 pm shift today.  In Lane 8.  Not a bad lane to work, albeit a very busy lane as it's a straight shot to the booth for traffic.

I have to say my new job as a toll booth collector is DIFFERENT, especially since I've worked in an office most of my life, doing the 8-5 stint.  Now I'm outside, not only weathering the storms and extreme heat, but also dealing with the public, a new person every 30 seconds or so. Variable shifts since I'm part-time... sometimes 3-11, or 7-3.  So far, no night shift work, referred to as "hoot" work.

I've made it my personal challenge to make every single person smile.  It's a tough challenge, and some people just REFUSE to smile.  You know the ones... their day isn't a good day unless they have something to gripe about.  And of course, everyone is in a huge hurry, which makes them even grumpier, waiting behind another car to pay their toll.

And so it's off to work I go.... after all, the bills must be paid!!  

Add Chrysler and Bank of America to that grumpy bunch when they don't get their monthly payment....

My Kitchen Table Rant

Does anyone else have this problem with their kitchen table??!

Yes, I'm starting small with my rants.  Just a messy kitchen table for my first real post.

We had a smallish kitchen table for a year or so, then we got this larger country farm table.  Seems it just gathers more "schtuff" since it's bigger.  And most of this stuff is my fault.  

Unread or half-read magazines - I really do have a hard time throwing magazines away.  I still keep them even after they are read.  You know, for reference. 

Books I'm reading...I just finished "Wicked" the other day, but as you can see, it still sits on the table. My work schedule calendar.  My glasses.  Mail.  Dog products. A broken dog collar. Binoculars that never seem to be "put away"... we are always hauling them back out of the closet to see something close-up... birds, wildlife, the neighbors working in their pastures.  Yeah, we can be nosy like that.

Ok, now that I've taken time out of my day to snap a photo, write a blog post and complain about it, I'm going to take the time to clean it up.  I think. :-)

My Real Life

I thought it was time to blog about the REAL me. I love my other blog, yes I do, but that blog emphasizes the good parts of my life! Like everyone else, I have days...dare I even say WEEKS...where everything seems to go wrong, and things just don't work out the way I plan.

This blog will be dedicated to the rants and raves of a lunatic female who is displeased from time to time with whatever life is dishing at her.

Won't you join me?

If you are interested in being a team blogger, and contributing to this blog on a regular or even an extremely irregular basis, please send me an email. I would love to hear from you.

It's comforting to know we're not alone in this crazy world. Not all of us have homes befitting the pages of Better Homes & Gardens. Heck, I would wager that most of us are struggling just to keep our homes maintained with the basics - water, electricity, heat, coolness, insurance, taxes. Even if our home is a small home!

There are a zillion other financial monsters... if you have credit cards, then there's a mountain of debt you're trying to conquer. If you have pets and/or domestic farm animals, there's feed bills and vet bills. Own a few vehicles, or even just one? There's gas to get from point A to point B, not to mention all the maintenance to keep your vehicle running - oil changes, new tires, new brakes, etc. And let's not forget the most basic of basics -- groceries!

Who knows? Maybe we can offer solutions to each other, or at the very least, we can spill our guts with our rants and just be there for each other.

Stay tuned.  My first rant is coming soon!